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Criminal jokes Page: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 Why was the robber bionic? He was holding up a bank. "Dad," said Fred to his father, who was a bank robber. "I need $50 for the school trip tomorrow." "OK, son," said his dad, "I'll get you the cash when the bank closes." A stupid bank robber rushed into a bank, pointed two fingers at the clerk and said, "This is a muck up!" "Don't you mean a stick up?" asked the girl. "No," said the robber, "it's a muckup. I've forgotten my gun." A woman woke her husband in the middle of the night. "There's a burglar downstairs eating the cake that I made this morning." "Who shall I call," her husband asked, "police or ambulance?" Fred: We had a burglary last night, and they took everything except the soap and towels. Harry: The dirty crooks. Why did the burglar take a shower? He wanted to make a clean getaway What did the burglar say to the watchmaker as he tied him up? Sorry to take so much of your valuable time. Judge: Why did you steal that bird? Prisoner: For a lark, sir. Judge: You claim you robbed the grocery store because you were starving. So why didn't you take the food instead of the cash out of the till? Burglar: Your Honour! I'm a proud man, sir, and I make it a rule to pay for everything I eat. I think I hear burglars, dear. Are you awake? No! |
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