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Cannibal jokes

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Why did the Scottish cannibal live on a sugar plantation?

He said, "So that I can feed my lads with m'lasses."


Why do cannibals make suitcases out of people's heads?

Because they're headcases.


What happened when a cannibal went on a self-catering holiday?

He ate himself.


First cannibal: I can't find anything to eat! Second cannibal: But the jungle's full of people. First cannibal: Yes, but they're all very unsavory.


Did you hear about the cannibals who captured a scrawny old hunter?

It sure gave them something to chew over.


Did you hear about the cannibal family who were caught spying by the witch-doctor?

They were given a right roasting.


Two cannibals were having their dinner. One said to the other "I don't like your friend." The other one said, "Well, put him to one side and just eat the vegetables."


The cannibal priest told his flock to close their eyes and say grace. "For whosoever we are about to eat, may the Lord make us truly thankful."


"Well, children," said the cannibal cooking teacher. "What did you make of the new English teacher?" "Burgers, ma'am."


Two cannibals were having lunch. "Your wife makes a great soup," said one to the other. "Yes!" agreed the first. "But I'm going to miss her terribly."








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