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Accountant jokes

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What would Economics be without assumptions?

Accounting


What does CPA stand for?

Can't Produce Anything


What does FCPA stand for?

Finally Caught Pinching the Assets


Why did the auditor cross the road?

Because he looked in the file and that's what they did last year.


Why did he cross back?

So he could charge the client for travel expenses.


How many auditors does it take to change a light bulb?

How many did it take last year?


How many cost accountants does it take to change a light bulb?

Hmmm........I'll just do a few numbers and get back to you


Laws of Accounting 1. Trial balances don't 2. Bank reconciliations never do 3. Working Capital does not 4. Return on Investments never will


Who was the first accountant?

Adam. He got interested in figures, turned the first leaf, made the first entry, lost interest after withdrawal, buggered up the monthly accounts and raised the first liability.


What's a shy and retiring accountant?

An accountant who is half a million shy and that's why he's retiring.








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